What the media misses in the latest A-Rod shenanigans

Would you take diet advice from Cousin Yuri?

So there was some actual big Alex Rodriguez coming out this week. The Miami Herald revealed that A-Rod played "Let's Make a Deal" with the feds in January, and that he admitted in a statement to doing performance enhancing drugs.

Newsflash -- in the baseball world, drug dealers may be used to out their addicts, but in the real world, those addicts are used to put the dealers behind bars. Obvious statement, but something a certain I-Team has had a hard time grasping.

The two things that fascinated me about Alex's statement were these things:


1) That A-Rod supposedly passed a PED test by using midstream urine. If this is true, then what does that say about MLB's testing system? This seems like a huge loophole to me. Shouldn't people in the media be looking into this? (Personally, I think the reason A-Rod passed is because Tony Bosch was selling him more snake oil than substance, but I still think MLB ought to have looked into this; Bosch himself has claimed the midstream story in the past.)

2) That A-Rod got diet tips from a fat guy. According to the Herald's story:

According to Rodriguez’s statement to DEA agents, in summer 2010 he had gained some weight and was experiencing some “problems” with injuries to his knee. He wanted to lose five to 10 pounds. 

Sucart, a man of considerable girth, told him he himself had lost some weight with the help of a South Florida “doctor.” Sucart said the man — he didn’t name him — could help Rodriguez get into better shape.

“Sucart told Rodriguez that the doctor was a smart guy and a guru,” the DEA reports said. “Rodriguez stated that Sucart was very aggressive and persistent about Rodriguez meeting the doctor.” 

Okay, I know A-Rod is pretty stupid on the way the world works, but this takes the cake.

Why in the world would a professional athlete known for being a fitness fanatic take diet advice from a fat person? Look at the photo from Cousin Yuri's arrest this summer. Not exactly slim and trim. Heck, I'm not exactly slim and trim myself, but I sure wouldn't take diet advice from somebody with Cousin Yuri's physique. Why would A-Rod? Is he really that dumb?

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Also love the media's handwringing about Alex Rodriguez's latest brouhaha in the news yesterday, as if having him come back to sully the pinstripes is something that must never happen. The Daily News' Mike Lupica sez that the Yankees need to make him an offer to get him to go away. (Um, Mikey, unless that offer has $61 million in it, A-Rod is gonna go all Dreamgirls "And I'm Telling You I'm Not Going" with the Yanks.)

Bob Nightengale of USA Today claims that nobody wants A-Rod back and whines:"Yet, as much as want to hide from Rodriguez, we can't stop hearing or talking about the man who betrayed anyone who believed in him." Of course. It's called increased page views, baby. And don't tell me that the media doesn't love talking about this -- it beats writing about the rest of this snoozeworthy Yankees team.

And the New York Times' Juliet Macur has a really dumb piece in which she says, "I feel sorry for the Yankees" because of this Miami Herald story revealing that he fessed up on steroids to the feds:

Poor Yankees. This past season, the franchise with enough World Series rings to bejewel a small army failed to make the playoffs for the second straight year. For a team whose fans expect championships on a steady basis, this little drought might as well be 119 years. It’s a solemn time for the Yankees, and they need some peace and quiet to reflect, and to figure out how to win again.

Rodriguez didn’t get that memo. Basically, he has returned playing the cymbals, ready to put on the pinstripes again for a team that needs no part of him or his noise but that now has to deal with a whole new set of drug revelations involving the onetime slugger.

1. Brian Cashman is most likely doing the Snoopy Dance over this story. Why? Because talking about A-Rod means less talk about the poorly constructed team he has run into the ground.

2. Macur doesn't seem to comprehend that this story is based on something Rodriguez did in January, and he had nothing to do with this being leaked. So her dopey cymbals analogy makes zero sense here.

3. Even a severely diminished A-Rod is still better than most of the current Yankees -- his 2013 .771 OPS was a better number than every single Yankee starter last year!

At any rate, I am sure Cashman is glad A-Rod is back clanging those cymbals, distracting everybody in the media who might dare to ask what his actual plan on bringing a championship to the Bronx is. Good grief.