Oy. The music played at Yankee games is giving me agita.

Make it stop! Please!

The Yankees really need to have somebody overhaul their music at games. For a franchise that prides itself on dignity and classiness, there is so much hokiness surrounding the Yankees' in-game entertainment. And the first person who needs to go is Kate Smith! She was one of the many topics my friend Dean and I discussed last Tuesday at the Yankees-Red Sox game we attended together. More specifically, it was her rendition of "God Bless America," which sounds at Yankee games like it's being played on an old Victrola, that has driven us nuts.

Dean would like to see the song gone for good. I would be happy either with only having it performed on Sundays, the way other teams do, or with having it performed live each night. Either way, the Kate Smith rendition sounds dated and awful; the sound quality is horrendous. It makes me long for the days of Ronan Tynan!

The latest "American Idol" winner performed the "Star-Spangled Banner" at the game we were at, but most of the time, the Yanks simply play a recording of the National Anthem. Which is pathetic in a place like New York City. How is it that the Mets can have an actual live person singing the song almost every time, but the Yankees don't bother? (An aside: I told Squawker Jon that the Mets ought to have "Started From the Bottom" by Drake as their theme song this year. Jon said that when he hears the name "Drake," he thinks of the duck on the Drake's Cakes!)

Heck, I run in a road race almost every weekend, and almost every single time, from the biggest races to the smallest, somebody sings the National Anthem in person before the race. Imagine that! Why can't the Yankees?

Then there are the Yankee-only traditions that won't die, even though they are way past their shelf life. The grounds crew doing "YMCA" was amusing -- 20 years ago! Now it's just tired. Either come up with more current song/dance moves or ditch the whole thing.

And "Cotton Eye Joe" was never fun. Ever. It's a dumb song, And the fact that it is "Cotton Eye Joe" and not "Cotton-Eyed Joe" drives this professional proofreader nuts! What is the connection to the Yankees, exactly? Because this song was a hit 20 years ago, when the Yankees first got good again? And who the heck is Cotton Eye Joey, anyway? To top it all off, even the control room this tool is dancing around in has a corporate sponsor. Enough! (Update: I just discovered what the song is really about -- an STD. Disgusting!)

The few bright spots when it comes to music at Yankee Stadium are some of the walkup music choices. A-Rod currently has "Run This Town" as his theme song, which is perfect for him. But my favorite is Brendan Ryan having "Relax" by Frankie Goes to Hollywood as his walkup music. Back in the day, when I used to sneak into nightclubs in Manhattan like Limelight and the Peppermint Lounge when I was still in high school, I used to hear that song all the time. The idea that it would be walkup music for an MLB player is even more shocking than The Ramones' "Blitzkrieg Bop" getting played during games!

Finally, here's my advice for the Yankees the next time they trot out that scratchy Kate Smith recording: Relax, don't do it!