How the mother of all cheat days goes awry -- in a way I didn't expect -- at the Big Apple BBQ Festival

I have been doing pretty well on my diet as of late -- I have lost another 12 pounds or so since the "after" picture in this article was taken for the Staten Island Advance last month. I really do try to make good, healthy choices at each meal, with real foods, not frankenfood fake "diet" food. And I am better at portion control. It has gotten easier now that I see real-life results (and also now that pretty much everyone I know is aware of my fitness journey!)

But I still love all kinds of food, both good and bad for me. Which means that I face temptations all of the time. Like the constant amount of free food I am tempted with at work. For example, my office had a "cheese party" the other day, in which we had to taste various high-end cheeses for a work-related reason. Yes, really! Cheese is one of my favorite foods, and I actually have an educated palate on it, plus I want to help out at my job, so I ate some and gave my opinions and enjoyed the cheese. Then I walked from the office to the Staten Island Ferry on the way home to make up for the cheese I ate!

As best friends. Squawker Jon and I have spent way too much time over the years going out to eat. My favorite restaurant is Red Rooster, but I have other faves throughout the city, from food trucks to fancy places. Which is why I have been making an effort to spend more time doing cultural and athletic activities instead of going out to eat all of the time!

And as you can guess, one of my favorite types of food is barbecue. I lived in Texas for 15 years, after all! And Squawker Jon likes BBQ as well. So once we went to the yearly Big Apple BBQ Festival in Manhattan, we were big fans. However, as the event grew in popularity, it became a nightmare due to the long lines.

I can't remember whether the last straw was the port-a-potty I went into at the festival that looked like something out of "Trainspotting,"  -- it was so bad, it caused an immediate reversal of fortune on my part. (Note: do not click on those links if you have a weak stomach!) Or whether or it was when we waited literally two hours in line for City Grocery's crawfish hushpuppies, only to have the stand close up shop due to the heat just before they were about to take our order! At any rate, we finally gave up on going for several years because it was just too crowded, even though I used to work right near it. It just seemed to be a huge hassle.

Squawker Jon and I at the Big Apple BBQ Festival.
  I am wearing the medal I earned in the race.

But earlier this year, we thought we would try the festival again, since the word on the street was that is was better run that in the past. However, I am supposed to be doing this fitness/weight loss journey to change my life. So in order to enjoy the barbecue with no guilt, I decided to sign up for the Oakley Mini 10K in Central Park for earlier in the morning. My thought was that I would make this a cheat day (or at least a cheat meal) and eat whatever I wanted, just for the festival.

So I ran the race today, got a medal, went to my gym to take a shower, and then met up with Squawker Jon. (I kept the medal on, though! That's how I roll!)

We decided to get to the Big Apple BBQ as soon as it opened at 11 to make sure that the lines were at a minimum. We ended up running late and got there at about 11:30 a.m., but even then, the lines were either small, or went very quickly. The plates at the event are small, so that people try multiple things. And we planned to eat a bunch of things.

The first thing we each got was an order of baby back ribs and baked beans from 17th Street Barbecue, Mike Mills' place. Mills, who shares the same name as the bassist from R.E.M., is perhaps the most legendary name in BBQ. So I was very much looking forward to this meal. Then I started eating the ribs, and realized something a few bites in -- the food was awfully greasy. I also noticed all the sugar in the baked beans order.

Was it me or the ribs? Jon loved them, and so did most everybody there. It was me. Have my taste buds or food preferences changed in a way where I don't like baby back ribs anymore? The horror! The horror! as Marlon Brando once said. I had a hard time finishing the ribs, and threw out the beans.

Then I got brisket and sausage from the Salt Lick, one of my Texas favorites. The brisket was great, the way the brisket my brother and I had in Texas last month was fantastic. The sausage, not so much. It was greasy, too! I ended up throwing out half of it! Shocker!

And while Jon went to a third place (Skylight Inn, from North Carolina, where the whole hog sandwich turned out to be his favorite dish of the day), I was more than satisfied with the food I ordered.

Nobody was more surprised by this turn of events than me! Back in the day, we would have been there for hours. Now I was ready to go pretty quickly!

The one real temptation I did have at the festival was the southern-style layer cake varieties from Sugaree's Bakery in Mississippi. Not only was the place named after "Sugaree," the Jerry Garcia/Grateful Dead song, but they had a strawberry layer cake! When I was a kid, I always requested either strawberry or cherry cake for my birthday, which my mother would make from a box. And here was a strawberry cake with strawberry buttercream frosting, made in a an authentic Southern way!

I don't have a huge sweet tooth, like others do, but I do have particular things I like. And this was one of them! But I told myself that the new Lisa would channel the Allman Brothers and "eat a peach" (which I did -- a stand sold peaches and watermelon) instead of the cake.

We were literally on our way out of the festival when that "Sugaree" cake called -- or is that sang? -- to me one more time. So I bought a strawberry slice and brought it home.

And you know what? It was fantastic! Much better than what Mom used to make (sorry, Mom!) And I enjoyed every single bite of it.

Now I need to go for a walk to burn off the calories; given how good it tasted, I am going to be walking to Long Island from Staten Island!

A rant: Why is Yankee Stadium ballpark food so bad, and Citi Field ballpark food so good?

We are now in Year 7 of new ballparks for the Yankees and Mets. The food at Citi Field, which was impressive to begin with -- Shake Shake, Blue Smoke, Catch of the Day, Box Frites, and El Verano Taqueria -- has gotten even better over the years, with new offerings each season. You can eat like a king at Citi Field, even if you are sitting in the cheap seats. 

Meanwhile, at Yankee Stadium, they might as well serve soylent green, giving how awful the food choices are. Lobel's, which with its steak sandwich used to have one of the few edible choices in the ballpark, has really gone downhill. I got food poisoning from the sushi stand a few years back, so that's out. Parm is good, but they are hard to find if you don't know where they are. Brother Jimmy's is no Blue Smoke, and Johnny Rockets is no Shake Shack, and both places are known more for their restaurants' atmosphere than their food, anyway. I am not six years old, so the nacho helmet and unlimited popcorn bucket hold no appeal for me.

Fried macaroni and cheese on a burger? Disgusting.

Of course, if you are in the Yankees' Legends seats, you can eat like a king there, with the unlimited crab legs, shrimp, prime rib, and celebrity chefs. (A telling anecdote: the one time Squawker Jon and I got to sit in the Legends seats, we met guest chef Frank Pellegrino of Rao's and got to eat his great food. Yet Mets fans can now get to eat Rao's food without having to have the fanciest seats in the ballpark -- most seats are eligible to get into the Caesars Club where the stand is.)

New York City is the food capital of the world. Squawker Jon and I have been to many great eateries in the city over the years. I recently even got to meet Red Rooster chef Marcus Samuelsson at the opening of his new rotisserie chicken place, Streetbird. So how is that the Mets can get so many big names in the food world -- Danny Meyer, Drew Nieporent, Josh Capon, Pat LaFreida, Dave Pasternack -- while the Yankees serve up swill like this horrible-looking "Bases Loaded Burger"? This abomination has fried macaroni and cheese on it. How thoroughly disgusting. Not to mention that the sandwich would be too unwieldy and messy to eat, unless they start handing out bibs like they do at lobster joints.

To add insult to injury, in New York City, a place famous for great pizza, the Mets have Two Boots pizza -- a fun choice -- while Yankees have Papa John's stands. Really? In a city with Lombardi's, Roberta's, Denino's, and a gazillion other pizza choices, they get Papa John's? What, Domino's wasn't available?

Meanwhile, Mets fans get delicious-looking items like these Rao's lemon chicken wings. The Mets folks do a great job at continually improving their food and drink choices (you can even get a Patron margarita at Citi Field!), while the Yankees seem content to serve up overpriced garbage and a lame beer selection.

Rao's lemon chicken wings look much more tasty. 

Aside from all the great restauranteurs in New York, there are so many food stand folks making interesting food these days. From Smorgasburg to Eataly to Hudson Eats to Le District to Berg'n to Madison Square Eats to all of the food trucks around, you can eat terrific food choices in the city made at food stands. You really would have to try to deliberately find bad food outlets to come up with the swill at Yankee Stadium.

Every time I write on this subject, people tell me I should bring in my own food to Yankee games. But why should I have to? Why can't the powers that be at Yankee Stadium get some decent food stands so that the masses, and not just the rich people, can have the choices that Mets fans do? 

A recent development sums up the contempt that Randy Levine et al have for us typical Yankee fans. There is now an app for your phone at Yankee Stadium, where you can order food to be delivered to your seat, a feature the Legends seats have had for years. But the app reportedly doesn't deliver food to the 400 level seats (the upper deck "cheap seats.") Figures.