Tuesday, June 2, 2015

I voted for Giancarlo Stanton 35 times on my All-Star Game ballot. Then he ate a KitKat Bar wrong. The monster!

I made a joke on Facebook the other day about how #VoteDrew, the hashtag to elect Stephen Drew to MLB's All-Star Game, was the saddest hashtag ever. Then it got me to thinking about who I would vote for on my All-Star ballot. Obviously, I voted my maximum 35 times for my main email address for Alex Rodriguez (and Mark Teixeira and Jacoby Ellsbury), and I also gave my votes to Yadier Molina, as I have been doing since 2007, just to tick off Squawker Jon. Here is the rest of my ballot. I used stats to determine most of the rest of my picks:

1B: Teixeria, NYY
2B: Altuve, HOU

3B: Moustakas, KC
SS: Semien, OAK
C: Vogt, OAK
DH: Rodriguez, NYY
OF: Trout, LAA, Ellsbury, NYY, Reddick, OAK *
Note: Hanley Ramirez has better numbers than Reddick, but I will never vote for a Red Sox for the ASG!

1B: Goldschmidt, ARI
2B: Gordon, MIA

3B: Frazier, CIN
SS: Peralta, STL
C: Molina, STL
OF: Harper, WAS, Pederson, LAD, Stanton, MIA

But now I want to rescind my 35 Giancarlo Stanton votes after seeing something outrageous. Look at how Stanton was seen eating a KitKat Bar! His teammate Dee Gordon (who also got my ASG vote) took a picture of this travesty. As Big League Stew's Mike Oz writes, "Look at this face. It's the face of a man who doesn't care that he's just committed a crime against candy." Won't somebody think of the children?

As others have noted, there are rules for eating a KitKat Bar. You may remember how the catchy single says: "Gimme a break, gimme a break, break me off a piece of that KitKat Bar." That entails breaking one of the four pieces of the bar off. You are supposed to follow these rules, and eat each wafer of the bar separately. You cannot just bite into the KitKat willy-nilly. It is just not done.

Former Yankee Brandon McCarthy also chastised Stanton, writing on Twitter: "Just cause u hit baseballs like most hit a 4 iron doesn't mean u can eat candy however u wish. We're living in a society here." Exactly! Change your candy-eating ways now, Giancarlo!

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