Monday, April 27, 2015

Subway Series Game 3: The 659th Home Run Song (Feelin' Petty)

It's nights like this that I want to be like Eric Campbell when it comes to numbers. I want to forget how many errors the Mets made (four), how many runs Jon Niese gave up (six, four earned) and how many games the Mets lost to the Yankees (two).

However, Squawker Lisa, there is one number I am quite pleased to remember, and that is 659. I wanted A-Rod to get just shy of 660 while the Yankees were at home so media and fan attention would mushroom. After all, what else do Yankee fans have to focus on - whether Nathan Eovaldi can complete five innings with a lead?

I especially did not want to see A-Rod get to 660 on an ESPN broadcast, not just because it would have been against the Mets, but because I want to hear the Yankee broadcasters stumble through the call. Ideally, Yankee fans would demand a curtain call, leaving Michael Kay struggling to explain why the fans are cheering so much ("Kenny, I think they just announced that all concession stands will no longer have condiments!").

Best of all would be if John Sterling couldn't help spewing home run calls for A-Rod's milestone-that-must-not-be-named,  why Suzyn Waldman desperately tried to stop him:

John:It is high! It is far! It is gone! He did it! A-Rod is A-MAYS-ing!
Suzyn: You know, John, Stephen Drew is closing in on the 500-50 club - 500 RBI and 50 steals for his career.

John: Say Hey-Rod!
Suzyn: John, the Yankees sure have a lot of pitchers with two first names: Adam Warren, Justin Wilson, Chris Martin, even Esmil Rogers if you consider Rogers Hornsby.

John: A-Rod tuned his radio to 660!
Suzyn: Goodness gracious, John, give it a rest!

John: A-Rod's the Six Million Dollar Man!

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